3LW. Just as true now as it was in 2001.
After 16 months of blogging, I got my first hate comments. Scroll down here for a comment from “Jeffry” and the double-whammy from “Phelonious.” Full name: “Phelonious Drixon.”
Ok, it’s ironic. Here I was writing about how I shouldn’t care what other people think and then they wrote these really mean comments AND I CARED.
Since all of us have both confidence and insecurities, how was I to know if I had crossed into that danger zone of simultaneous over-confidence and pathetic insecurity that I was being accused of?
I started to worry that my boys Jeffry and Phelonious Drixon were onto something and I was just too delusional, too much like Narcissus staring into his own reflection, to see it.
But Jeffry – who, by the way, I’m pretty sure I went out on two dates with back in August – and Phelo said enough things that simply missed the mark. I wasn’t trying to impress anybody, and certainly, NO WHERE did I make any racist or class-based evaluations of individuals. These guys clearly don’t really know me or my sense of humor and haven’t read much of my blog. If they had read this post, this post, this post, or particularly this post, they wouldn’t have made false accusations about me.
I guess I stumbled upon a taboo topic on this one that really set these two guys off: treating people differently based on their qualities (!) . But I won’t apologize for evaluating people based on the same standard of moral character to which I hold myself.
I don’t think I’m perfect; many people are more empathetic than me, are more natural caregivers or more generous with their time. I think I can learn from watching them – and that’s why these are the people that I want to surround myself with. Frankly, calling such people “extraordinary”–and in so doing, labeling their strong moral character as rare–is the only way I can psychologically cope with the fact that there are so many wishy washy people out there. I must accept things as they are instead of how I want them to be.
This was the first time I experienced the downside of being so completely open and vulnerable on the internet. However, I’m grateful for this experience because, after letting their comments get to me, the whole experience has only pushed me further toward my goal of trusting myself and knowing when to be influenced.
Jeffry, if you are the guy that I went out on two dates with, I thought you were a really good person. I shuffled you real quick into the extraordinary box.
And Phelonious, you’re right – I’m not just bad at sports. I’m also really bad at cooking, but that’s about it.